Falling in Love at Work

Getting a Grip - Personal workplace advice from Handshake 2.0 Dear Getting a Grip:  I’m married, my co-worker is married, but when we’re together at work, we have such chemistry.  I’m not falling in love, but I’m so close to it.  If anything happened between us, the repercussions at work and for both of our marriages would be disastrous.  What am I supposed to do with these strong feelings?

Dear Feelings:  Falling in love at work is not the problem.  How to handle falling in love at work is.  Each of us falls in love at work.  Human beings are built for love and love happens – with co-workers, neighbors, church-goers, soccer parents.  In the midst of chemistry, individuals find it difficult to remember they are not part of a singular love story, but part of the human condition.

Getting a Grip:  Celebrate the feeling and do not act on it.  Use it as a signal to consider whether or not other parts of your life are as fulfilling as you need or want them to be – including your marriage.  If things need to change, change them.  Then revisit the chemistry.  Most of the time, for one or both of you, the bond just doesn’t have the same attraction.

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Need to start “Getting a Grip” on a personal problem at work?  E-mail your question to [email protected].

Getting a Grip, the workplace advice column for Handshake 2.0, is written by Anne Giles Clelland.  Getting a Grip regrets that not all questions can be answered, personal replies are not possible, and questions may be edited for brevity and clarity.

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Anne Clelland's workplace advice column appears monthly in Valley Business FRONT. A version of this column appeared in the January, 2009 issue.

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